Obviously we need to speak one common language for us to understand each other. This “same” language is not only about grammatical syntactic comprehensive words.It also includes all non-verbal communication through the eyes, the face, the body.
Yet, Emotions seem to be the most challenging language we struggle to decode. Maybe because it doesn’t have rules, and it is not a standard language with clear definitions illustrated in a dictionary.
In Love, there are languages too. They say there are five languages of love. Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch.
What usually happens that cause partners to drift apart is their inability to understand each others’ languages, since each one of us expresses love in a certain way and at the same time expects this love to return back in the same form. And that is far from being real…
Everyone of us, men and women, speak from two to three languages of love. You might not realize it but if you start paying attention to the way you express your emotions, you will find a dominant one, followed by one or 2 others. A woman can express her love to her man by preparing a nice romantic dinner. While he prefers to be close to her physically. And a man needs from his woman to affirm her love using kind gentle words, yet she prefers he’d help her more in the house chores.
The thing is in any couple, there might be different dominant love languages. And that is not a disaster! because still there can be other secondary common languages. But if in a relationship, there are NO common languages at all, then the result is predictable and unavoidable…
The key here for the spouse is to start by discovering his/her own language, and noticing his/her partner’s. What comes after is making the decision and choosing to speak your partner’s language. This is considered as one the biggest deposits you can make in a couple’s emotional bank account. The more you communicate with the right mean, the more you increase your account balance. The less you do, the more you make huge emotional withdrawals.
Sometimes it happens to see your partner having difficulties understanding your language. Don’t get frustrated and start losing hope, you just need to simply tell him/her how you like it..no need to feel awkward in clearly communicating it. After all, we cannot expect a long-lasting healthy relationship without open communication..
In other words, treat others as you wish to be treated. Make an effort to listen and understand before seeking to be understood. What you give you get back…
For more info on the topic of the Five languages of love, check this link and take the assessment: